From Russia With Love

Metro platform, 7 pm waiting for the train so I can get home after a long day at work.  My heeled feet are killing me and my bag is heavy.  About 18 stops, a bus and a 15 minute walk and then Voila!  Home sweet home.  The train arrives and so I get on the first car…  It is suspiciously deserted.  When I survey the right side, I see why.  There is an older lady passed out long ways  in her own potato soup chunky puke and the smell…

Delicious.  I hurriedly step out and into the next car I fly because the train is  about to leave.  I sit, settle and glance around.  Ugh oh, this one is deserted too… and there is the reason laid out over the far side of my bench.  A man who is so drunk he cannot lift his own foot from the floor to the seat.  Great…  I begin saying the mantra  “Please don’t puke.  Please don’t puke” when I realize I am not alone in the car.

There are two old ladies directly across from me:  one has a disapproving look, every once and a while she shakes her head in disgust at the drunk man, the other seems to think  this is an act put on by the city just for her amusement.

Every time the man attempts to bring his foot to the bench and fails, she smiles, laughs and nudges her disapproving friend excitedly like it is a comedy routine and the audience applause light came on.  On the same bench with the ladies but on the other side I notice an attractive guy.  He is staring at me so I look anywhere but up  into his blue eyes.  The car may have been a good choice after all.  The eye diversion goes on for a bit until he opens the gift bag next to him, pulls out a bottle of cheap whiskey and takes a swig.

Perfect.  If you began to think that this wasn’t in the US, you are absolutely correct.  It is Moscow, Russia to be exact.  The same country that Hannibal, Napoleon and Hitler with their massive armies couldn’t survive and where I currently reside.

My name is Nell Cobb, I am 26 and currently living in Moscow, Russia as a teacher of English. Let the adventure commence.